revolving door.
Seriously, my love life is like a revolving door at this point. Guys that I would be interested show up stay for a brief second, then leave. This whole dating/ being single thing is not my cup of tea. However, I do kind of like the being single part and not worrying about anything, as of right now. There are times when I wish I could just sit down with a good guy, snuggle and watch a movie, sure, but I mean there is plenty of time for that when we are old and moldy.
I don’t know I just feel like something is going to happen soon, whether it be good or bad. I just have a feeling that something is going to impact my life tremendously, and I don’t know if I am ready for it. I mean, sure… it has been a long time blah, blah, blah I know… believe me if I could just make myself stop thinking about it, I would. I just feel like if something good comes around, I’m not going to realize it, and let it pass by. And if something bad happens, I just don’t really know what I will do. I think I will be angry… angry that I don’t have a person to help me… someone that can comfort me. Also, if something good happens and it is a new guy who I fall head over heels for, something tells me I’m not going to be able to have everything happen so easily. He is going to make it difficult… I hope he doesn’t. After everything, it would be cruel and selfish. I don’t know why I really worry about this… but I do. I think I am ready, but I just need something to happen to push me to that spot I suppose, something to make me see what I can have again. Yeah, that’d be really nice, I think.
Maybe I’m just worrying for nothing, maybe he doesn’t care anymore, and will let me be, I know I would let him be if the situation were reversed. Time will tell.
